I'd stare into space just occasionally,
transported back to when we were a "we".
And sometimes I stalled in the middle of shops,
recollecting our closeness; I'd suddenly stop.
It made my head spin and each breath was a strain,
my heartbeat was wrong, and my eyes sore and strange
Intoxicated with memories of you...
I was the companion of my Dr Who.
I wish you could remember the time when we met,
You'd checked with your mentor - he said you were set
But you warned me, you told me, that you were my crush
And I said you weren't, but it did feel too much:
The inflexible way that your life must be governed;
No room for mistakes from the people who love you.
And though you managed your pain all your life
your rage was alarming, your disgust like a knife.
You seemed to hit bottom, then kicked up the dust;
You didn't believe I was worthy of trust.
It was sometimes a struggle, emotionally,
when I felt the compromise was coming from me.
But - much of the time we were simply in love;
Your jokes made me laugh and we'd cuddle enough.
The horse game was funny, your music was bitchin'
and an @actualhedgehog once lived in our kitchen.
And I know it was real, how each of us felt,
You supported me through all the crap cancer dealt.
It's long since we've parted, relationship-wise,
We now don't communicate most of the time.
So I just want to tell you you'll always be loved,
and I hope there's no anger when you think of us.
We were invincible once, against all the world;
You were simply my boy, I loved being your girl.